I have been considering writing about relationships for a while but kept changing my mind because my track history of relationships of any kind is not exactly good!  But I am sure I am not the only one with negative tales to tell about this subject, so I hope some of you at least can relate.

Firstly, parental relationships; in actuality I could probably write a book about how awful my relationship was with my parents!  This is in part because my mother was abusive towards me.  However, I never felt that I could connect with them.  I remember when I was three, watching my mother in her bedroom (whilst awaiting a telling off).  She was kneeling on the floor peeling off a face mask and I thought she was like an alien and we were completely different types of beings.

As for friendships, I have always struggled.  I don’t know if it’s because I say the wrong thing, act inappropriately or am just not reciprocating time and caring efficiently.  I have always found friendships intensely difficult to maintain.  Even when I was four I would prefer to be on my own, preferably being creative or reading, than being amongst my classmates.  Consequentially I love Facebook, via which I have numerous lovely friends!  I find it easier to communicate online and there is far less pressure with online friendships.  I don’t have to present myself a specific way, put on the mask that I wear to pretend I am ‘normal’ and part of society.  I don’t even have to fake a smile!

Finally, the most difficult one for me: romantic relationships.  I can’t seem to meet the ‘right’ men and I frequently confuse friendliness for a more romantic interest in me.  I mean, how do other people know these things?!  I like romance, I like affection and the security of being in a relationship. So how do I end up getting it so wrong?!

Sadly I don’t have the answers; I really wish I did!  There are probably a lot of neurotypicals (non-ASD people) who wish they had the answers too, at least I think so.  It is a very common problem for Aspies.  Real life, and real relationships of any kind, are very confusing to me.  I think this article should include a suggestion box at the end!

All joking aside, if you are having difficulties making and maintaining relationships, you are not alone.

Love and peace to you all.


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